The point of my blog was to keep writing every day, and to write about motherhood indirectly--that is, to address the topic while also retaining the ability to distance myself from it. (This in order to retain my sanity as a new mother, to have at least one moment in the day which did not revolve around my son.) I also wanted to protect my son's privacy, by not divulging too much about his personal characteristics and habits in my daily posts.
I did succeed at writing almost every day--but ultimately, as indicated in the previous post (September 15th), I did write quite a bit about the more mundane aspects of motherhood. Some of the posts were marginally more inventive than that, so I don't think the whole project was a failure, but so much of it was that I don't see it at all as something fit for public consumption.
I do see it, however, as a way to let my son know what life was like, for me and for him, when he's much older and might be curious about such things. I kept a journal while I was pregnant (actually, long before I was pregnant with my son--while I was experiencing the miscarriages--I also wrote), and I think I'll keep another one from now on--this one, meant only for his eyes, not for anyone else's.
At the same time--I need to refocus myself on my so-called writing career. I've only written two short-short stories since the last post, over a month ago. I've been so busy with my very active boy, organizing his fall schedule and taking him to his multiple playgroups and swim classes and other activities, that it has left virtually no time for anything else. Now his schedule is set and we've adopted a certain comfortable (though physically exhausting) weekly rhythm, and his longer afternoon naps make it possible for me to write for at least an hour, maybe two, every day. By September of next year, I'll have perhaps another fifteen hours a week (assuming he's in some sort of preschool at that point) for my writing projects.
It's time to return, in other words, to more intimate writing, and to much more public writing as well. This blog is leading me nowhere.
But it was fun while it lasted.
Cheers to all those older mothers out there.
