Compassion

When I think of the word "compassion" I automatically think of Buddhism, since the word and the concept play such a central role in its practice and teachings. The compassion of Buddhism is perhaps a little different than what Milan Kundera describes, in The Unbearable Lightness of Being, by indicating the Latin roots, "com" and "passio," meaning literally, "with" and "suffering." Kundera movingly describes in that novel, Tomas taking up the hands of Tereza and kissing them because of a terrible dream she had in which her fingertips were being pierced with needles. In an indirect way, she has had this dream because he has been unfaithful to her, and he cannot bear to see her suffering. Kundera also says that the root meaning of the Polish and Czech words for "compassion" (these being non-Latin-origin languages) is a little different--something more like "feeling with" than "suffering with." This is a significant, if subtle, difference..."feeling with" being perhaps more of a help to the sufferer than "suffering with," in many situations.

But what about the Buddhist meaning of "compassion"? While I'm no expert on Buddhism, I think it's not so much about feeling-with, but a sort of being-with...what I described, perhaps, in an earlier post--walking with my mother when she was sick with cancer and could only walk thirty yards or so. Where compassion is required, Buddhist philosophy seems to say, don't rest comfortably in your feelings; do something. I think this sort of philosophy permeates Japanese and other Asian cultures in many ways.

What does this have to do with raising a child? Everything...